A 12 Step program

So, we've been found. Old news. I have put off writing about it, though because I knew I was not finished with the emotions that I knew were inevitable to hit me regarding this. They say that when someone close to you dies you go through steps of grievance, anger, denial, acceptance and 2 more that I can't think of because I didn't pay attention in Psy101. At first I was shocked, how on earth could they have found us?! Then I was mortified, I must quit my job right now and never face these people again and erase everything on here immediatly. Then I was angry (still am a bit) how dare they (even though I put it out on the internet myself). Then there was that moment of defiance, Fuck them - now I'm going to be more graphic, more in your face. I think I'm finally coming to the acceptance stage. The fact of the matter is, I'm a very private person and I don't open up to people very easily or very often. If I get to know you its probably because YOU are really outgoing or I have had a lot of alcohol so I'm chatty. Otherwise you probably don't know dick about me. I do this on purpose, because I don't generally trust people. I've been screwed over too many times to just have a general faith in people. Because of this people take me wrong when they first meet me, so I've been told. I hear 'stuck-up' alot, 'bitch' a whole bunch and my personal favorite - intimidating. I made a pact with myself a long time ago that I was going to quit making apologies for myself because no matter what I did somebody wasn't going to like me. If you want to get to know me, and you don't want to say 'Hey, I'd like to get to know you, we should grab a drink some time' then go ahead, read my blog. Maybe you will learn something about me that will make you like me or maybe something that will make you hate me. At this point I figure that it will be about the same outcome if you tried talking to me so go ahead. And if you think its cool and you want one of your own, go to Blogger and start one up. It doesn't cost anything and the code is all on templates so you do not need to know how to write html. I'm going to continue posting exactly how I have been, its going to be graphic, I will talk about my marriage and my kids and my job and my sex life, and my dogs, and my best friend, and my co-workers. So, enjoy your stay here and please leave a comment in the box.